So, what did you do this weekend?

Remember when I vaguely mentioned we had some stuff going on with us in this post? Well it all happened this weekend. What happened you ask? This happened:

Yep, on Saturday morning, the man of my dreams got on a plane to Afghanistan for the year. It was a sweet and rough weekend of goodbyes but irreplaceable memories. Sam and I sat up Friday night praying for each other and trying to laugh. He looked at me and said, “I know without a doubt in my mind this is God’s will for our family. And whenever you’re following the Lord, the highs will be higher and the lows will be lower. This is just a low point but we have to keep rejoicing.” So my man, I will keep rejoicing as my feet creep over to your side of the bed trying to find yours or when I have the privilege to tell Bud that his daddy is fighting for justice in a place that so desperately needs it and that he will be back so soon.

I sat on the couch last night watching movies on Netflix, eating a ridiculous amount of candy, and drinking a healthy-sized glass of wine and and had myself a good cry. Then I clung to Scripture like my life depended on it. Psalm 73:26 — I begged him to be my portion and my strength. Isaiah 41:10– He is my God, He will strengthen, help me, and uphold me in his righteous right hand.

I know these things to be true and He will be my breath. I know now that I can’t get through this without the Lord, it’s as simple as that. I must have His strength. It’s my lifeline.

I know each day will get a little easier, definitely not easy, but easier. I will hold those conversations so dearly that Sam and I had Friday night and will count down the days until he gets home. Saturday morning when we woke up, I tried to tell him that I talked to Afghanistan and they didn’t need him anymore. They had miraculously found peace and were all playing bridge together. But for some reason, he didn’t believe me. It was worth a shot.

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  • Oh goodness girl. I am praying so hard for you. Hugs to you and that sweet baby of yours!!!

  • Erica Castillo

    So sorry, hun… I know how much that sucks. 🙁 🙁 

  • Tove

    I’m so sorry!! My hubby was deployed for 7 months before we had a baby and it wasn’t fun. He’s on a TDY right now and I keep trying to be grateful it’s just a TDY and not a deployment. Lean into Jesus – He will always take care of you!!! I’ll pray for you and if you want to swap, you can come live in NC and I’ll head back to WA in your place!

    • Thanks!! YES, lets swap 🙂

      • Tove

        Just woke up and God had you on my heart again; been lifting you up in prayer big time. These first few weeks are the worst but it gets better and time will start to go fast. Set yourself little benchmarks every week or so and just look to those rather than the full year. Also, you get those great butterflies and new relationship jitters when he comes home. Kind of like a renewal button for your marriage – one of the perks of deployment? Trying to be positive for ya! 🙂

  • Oh Martha, I am so sorry. I just can’t imagine.

  • love you friend. praying lots. ?

  • Martha. When I scrolled down and saw the bags I blurted out “OH NO!!!!” I am so sorry. I will be praying for you and your brave family. 🙂

  • Olga Pisarskiy

    Martha all I can say is…….”I will pray for you and sweet little Bud”.  I cant imagine how tough it will be until your hubby returns.  Im here if you ever need to talk.  Love you friend!

  • Kristin

    I tried telling my husband that he couldn’t possibly expect me to take care of myself.  It was worth a shot, but also didn’t work.   It’s okay to eat lots of candy (or, in my case, ice cream in 2012 if this is your situation).  My husband is over there too.  There’s actually a lot of bloggers who have husbands in “the ‘stan” right now.  Not ideal, not good, not what we want AT ALL.  But God, prayer, friends, and faith will get us all through it.

  • jessi

    oh man.  my heart goes out to you and your family.  i will definitely be praying for y’all.

  • Sleep on his side of the bed, then you wont roll over looking for him. My MIL told me that before kev left and I thought she was crazy, then tried it and sure enough was able to sleep. Then he got home and we had to switch sides because I had grown used to it. 🙂 Love you so much friend!!!!

  • I’ve come by from Kate’s blog (Daffodils) just to tell you that you are in my thoughts and prayers.  My husband was deployed to Iraq for 13 months and I know how hard it can be.  It’s seems like he’ll be gone forever right now, but time will fly.  It does get easier.  I promise.  

    Sending up a prayer for your beautiful family right now.  And an extra prayer of safety for your husband.

  • sagittarian

    Hi Martha!:) This is my first time here, thanks to Kate !:) As reading your post, my tears fall, touched my heart with your words. Always keep in mind what your husband told you are true, God will always keep you and your family together. Let’s all pray  and I know God is always here for us.

    Nice knowing you Martha..:) Muaaahhh!! :)Hug and kisses to your cute little boy too! 🙂

  • Marilyn C Rush

    God bless
    you and your family Martha. You can get through itt with your beautiful boy!

  • Oh honey, I am thinking of you! I don’t know how you find the strength but you are so brave. The best part is that one day, your sweet little boy will understand how hard his daddy worked for him and what it really means to be an american. <3 to you!

  • Kathryn Ivey


    Tears filled me eyes reading your post, and I can’t imagine what it must feel like to say goodbye to your dear husband for a year. I will be praying for you! At least you got your “boy” buddies with you day in and day out:) 

  • Amanda

    I don’t know you, but stumbled across your blog and I love your writing. (funny side note, you visited the church I go to, Mars Hill, last summer when your little guy was brand new. I got to hold him in the nursery!) Your post made me cry! I’m so sorry your hubby is gone. I pray it goes by quickly and you’re able to keep busy with your adorable baby. Thankful you know Jesus!

    • oh too funny amanda! we loved yalls church it was just too far of a drive for us 🙁 we always talk about how we wished it was a little closer!

  • Lea

    Hang in there.  I love reading the blog and admire you, your family, and your faith.  Prayers from here.

  • Praying for you sweet friend. I can’t wait to give you a big fat hug.

  • Erin B.

    I’m finally catching up on my google reader and just read this post. I’ve never commented on your blog but I’ve been following you for a while now. I had my sweet baby Aubrey just 3 months ago and I have enjoyed following your blog and starring posts I want to refer back to. This brought tears to my eyes – you are such a strong woman and I admire you w/o even knowing you! Keep that faith – He will pull your family through this!

  • MOMsheena10

    Oh tears, there you go. I feel so sad for you that your hubby left. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you, especially for your baby. But God has plans better than your plans, so hang on there and think of happy things. Moments like this will surely cast your worries away:

    I admire you for your brave heart. God Bless you and your family.
    Love sheena