What was my mantra again?

Well folks, tomorrow is my “due date”.

I use quotations because I know how ambivalent due dates are. It is so funny to me because I was so focused on not having this baby early before the hubbs got here that now I’m afraid he’ll be really late! Sam was praying for me in bed last night because I needed a major attitude adjustment about being so uncomfortable. I asked him to pray for me and the shooting pain down my right butt cheek. Of course his prayers were like water to my soul because they covered so much more than that.

You see, I love my husband. I love our marriage. We have an amazing life together. And I think because of that, some fears started to creep in last night by telling me that having the baby would change our marriage for the worst and that we’d lose what we have. Anybody else have those fears when they were pregnant?

I know that having a baby will ultimately change things, but we’ve just been praying blessings over our marriage that we’d still keep each other a priority, we wouldn’t lose the romance, and we would have grace for each other when we’re tired and covered in baby vomit.

I’m beyond grateful for my husband and I’m beyond grateful to be pregnant. I know that God will burst our hearts even bigger with love for this baby. I just keep remembering my birth mantra, “The opposite of fear is faith” and I’ve been saying it over and over like a crazy person in the subway.

It is a very strange feeling to just be waiting on something so big though! I don’t really feel anything going on down there but I’m definitely getting more and more uncomfortable. Now that Sam has made it home, I’m ready. After my appointment tomorrow, I’ll start some natural induction stuff this weekend and next week! Nothing sexier than a 9 month preggo trying to have sex with her husband all the time, bouncing on the exercise ball, and eating spicy foods… that sounds like a Jerry Springer scene when the camera pans over to introduce the next ever-s0 classy guest.

So in addition to me leaving you with the image of shoving myself in lingerie, bouncing on a exercise ball whilst shoving a burrito in my mouth (you’re welcome)….feel free to send some prayers and good thoughts our way, we’ll keep you posted!

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  • sandy russell

    If you were here we could have a race in the paper box cart! That might get things started!! 🙂
    I have no doubt that your marriage will stay as grand as it is right now because of the faith that you and Sam share!
    Hang in there and be sure to post pics ASAP!!! Love you!

  • Pat Nifong

    Do we need to come and get you started?? I’m sure we can think of something to help you. We are waiting and counting down with you.
    You and Sam will be fine, there is too much love there not to be.
    We all miss you and love you.
    We will be waiting on the first pictures of “our baby”

  • Amy

    I had a lot of those same thoughts about messing up our great relationship – because you can’t take it back! Once you have a kid, boy are you stuck. And there have been tons of changes, some hard times related to kids, some hard times independent of the kids, and a lot of growth. It’s been so amazing to watch Mike grow into being a father, and it’s made him a better husband too.

  • Melinie

    One day Ben looked at me and said “malachi was the best thing we have ever done” I loved it because I completely understood. We are a closer and stronger than we ever were before a baby and I thought we were close then. I was sad to see our life as just the two of us go but the dimension that a kid adds to your relationship with your husband is amazing, awe inspiring, and directs you right to the feet of God. It’s awesome. Praying for you 🙂

  • Kristin Boone

    When Steve and I went to marriage encounter one of the questions was something like when have you felt closest to each other and when the most at odds. We both answered in relation to our kids. They have brought us to a new level of intimacy and been the center of some of our most passionate disagreements. Now that they are so grown and the nest is emptying we are finding that it’s still so much fun to be a couple and best friends! I guess I am just saying it’s all good! Life never stays the same but the Lord does. Love you!
    PS Deep squats and black kohosh, warm baths and a foot massage!

  • meredith mcdaniel

    girl, you crack me up! that imagery is just too much for this pregnant lady, i’m rolling & about to pee in my pants, while trying not to wake up grady who is napping 🙂 baby metzler will be here in His perfect time… no doubt. no rush. & you + sam will be blown away by the LOVE that will overflow all over the place from the moment of labor, delivery, & birth beyond! i’m so excited for you & for all it entails. the good, the hard, its all worth it.

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